a grand adventure...

...that was supposed to take place at the Grand Canyon

but ended up happening in Glenwood Springs, Colorado


A little back story: Plans have been in place for months to go to the Grand Canyon for a very special occasion (keep reading to find out just what that occasion is). The night before we were scheduled to go, the weather forecast reported a high chance of snow, plus we caught wind of the possibility of a park closure. So we made a frantic last minute change and headed to the hot springs of Colorado!

On the way, we stopped at a little Dinosaur Museum in Fruita, Colorado. Here are some pictures from this silly adventure!











Once we got to our destination we filled our time with lots of
fun adventuring...
frisbee/softball at the park
geochaching expeditions
playing Family Business & Banagrams til the wee hours of the morning
eating lots of yummy food
swimming in these amazing hot springs

& (last but certainly not least)

Celebrating the engagement of these two lovebirds

Here are some pictures from the party we had waiting for them after the proposal!

{excuse my red eyes... the hot springs were hard on me! haha}

Congrats Jake & Michelle!
I am absolutely beaming for you!

What's up, South Carolina?

Miss Hailey Little was in SLC this week for a nursing convention... So amidst all the craziness in my life, I've been painting the town with this beloved friend. You may remember her from my posts this past summer in Minnesota. She is the best friend I made during my time at the Mayo Clinic and has continued to be a huge blessing in my life! I am so grateful that I got to see her and spend some time catching up! What a sweet friend! We've applied for a few jobs at the same hospital, so who knows... maybe we'll be roomies again soon?!?!

Surrender Update

{via}

Oh, wow... sorry I've been such a slow poke on getting around to writing an update on my little Lenten experiment in surrendering my future to the Lordship of Christ. I honestly do not feel like I can adequately put into words all that I have learned through this season - it has been a bigger undertaking than I anticipated, but the challenge has been so good for me. To sum it up...

Trust takes work
&
I'm bad at it

It has been a daily struggle for me to choose to trust God when everything in me is yearning to yield to worry and control and lists and pursuing things on my own accord. I have clumsily made my way through this fast and have struggled to remain faithful at each and every turn, but God so graciously continues to loosen my grip and is somehow growing me each time I intentionally choose to open my hands in surrender. Here are some of the highlights of what God's been up to in this little heart of mine:

...Change IS coming...

{via}

Change and I have a love-hate relationship... Although it seems to have more of an affection for me that I have for it. As silly as this sounds, one of the biggest things I've been struggling with over the course of this Lenten season is the reality that change is coming. It's coming and there is nothing I can do about it. Somehow I think I previously convinced myself that I had some fraction of control over that... but I'm learning the truth is the exact opposite: it is completely out of my hands. So, whether I choose to take this job, or that job... whether I choose to stay or to go... things will not be the same as they've been for the past 5 years... and that's been a hard pill to swallow. There are things I'm not ready to let go of, things that I fear I cannot live without. Mostly it's just hard for me to picture living life with a different group of people. But over and over in the past couple of weeks, I have been reminded that those I love are choosing to move on and take risks and chase after their dreams... so I need to too. I cannot just put my life on hold in rebellion to upcoming changes. As scary as it may be, change is here and it's time to embrace it!

...What do you want?...

{via}

I was reading through the book of Mark a few weeks back and came across the story of Bartimaeus. At the climax of the story, Jesus asks the blind beggar, “What do you want Me to do for you?," to which Bartimaeus responds, "Rabbi, I want to see." I chewed on this encounter for a good week and felt challenged to answer the same question for myself... As a follower of Christ, what do I want Him to do for me? Why am I choosing to seek Him? What. Do. I. Want. (out of life/my future/my walk of faith)? As I circled back to these questions over and over again, I felt a tangible shift of heart... The words of the blind beggar began to resonate and I realized that what I really want is to see. I want to see Christ at work and see his beauty and life reach a broken and hurting world. I want to experience deep intimacy with my Savior. I want to taste and see that He is good. In His infinite wisdom, the Lord took me through this story to renew my mind and refocus the eyes of my heart... I want to see.

...An Idol Factory...

{via}

"The human heart is an idol factory." - John Calvin

Just when I was feeling settled in figuring out what I want, God began to reveal the fickle nature of my affections. It all started while cleaning my room and listening to this sermon. In it Mark Driscoll points out that, "idolatry is having created people and created things in place of the creator God for ultimate allegiance, value, and worth." Somewhere in between sweeping the floor and sorting out laundry, I felt like I had been hit with a ton of bricks. God really used the truths presented in this sermon to convict me of the idolatry that I've allowed to sink into my heart and life. Idolatry is such a gross word and an even worse thing to find within yourself. I could go on and on about the different things I've been processing through on the topic, but the main thing I've been working on is my struggle to idolize my own experience - I look to richness of experience and significant adventures to save me from a life of mediocrity. I'm coming to see the sinfulness in that - Jesus saves me from a life of mediocrity, not my own life experience. For no matter what heights or mountain top experiences I have, nothing compares to the greatness of knowing and loving Christ. I desperately needed this reminder/kick in the pants.

...Flight Response...

{via}

If you've been reading this little blog for any amount of time, I'm sure you have noticed that my heart is prone to wanderlust. I've always accepted this as a trait that is simply part of who I am. Though I believe that I am wired this way for a specific purpose, I rarely take the time to assess the restlessness and discontentment it can often breed in my life. One ordinary Friday afternoon, on a day when I was particularly struggling with worry and mistrust, Christina looked at me square in the eye and said, "You have this strange flight response... Whenever you're feeling insecure or unstable, you have this tendency to flee, to leave" (gotta love having a friend who will shoot it straight with you, right?!?). I didn't really know how to respond, but the truth she so bravely spoke really penetrated my heart. I've realized that I do this in life, in relationships... I wander, I get up and go. Sometimes it's prompted by pure motives, and other times it's prompted by fear. So the challenge that came along with this humbling realization, is that leaving is not the answer. To be clear, I might pick up and leave SLC in a matter of months. I also might stay right here where I'm at. But the point is that leaving is not the answer to my uncertainties and fears. I need to turn to God for the answer not to those things, not the prospect of a new adventure. I stumbled across a quote that beautifully summarizes the lesson I've been learning, "It is our wisdom to make the best of that which is, for it is seldom that changing our place is mending it" (Matthew Henry).

...In the Same Boat...

Your love has given me much joy and comfort, my sister, for your kindness has often refreshed the hearts of God’s people. - Philemon 1:7


As you all know, this sweet friend came for a visit a few weeks ago... and let me tell you, it could not have come at a better time! On top of all our adventures in SLC, we had a lot of time to talk and pray about life and faith and change and growing up. God used Shannon's wisdom and encouragement to refresh my heart. On the day she left I wrote the following in my journal: "I am feeling so encouraged in this journey. I know that it's all going to turn out as it should. Sometimes it helps to know that someone else is walking through the same thing, is fighting the same battle, and believes the same God is going to come through for her."

...One step at a time...


This last little lesson is, well, just that... little. I've been feeling challenged this week to just take things one step at a time. I know that seems silly, but I have a tendency to look way way too far ahead when I'm making decisions. I weigh out the pros and cons and try to think through the far reaching implications of the decision I'm making, which isn't always a bad thing, but the way I do it can be. I'm learning that I need to make the decisions for what they are - for what I feel is right in that isolated situation - and not worry so much about what they will mean for the rest of my life... I guess sometimes I over analyze and worry that somehow I'm going to miss out on God's will and my dreams in life. I'm slowly learning to trust my hopes for the future to the Lord, knowing that he will be faithful to fulfill the desires of my heart, even though that will likely look different that what I have envisioned... that's what makes this walk of faith an adventure, right?!

Okay, this is officially the longest post. ever. Sorry about that! I hope y'all have a little better picture of what's been swimming around in my little noggin' over the past few weeks. As you can see, I've been processing and learning a lot! The funny thing about this surrender is, I am not even one step closer to having clarity on what my future will look like... I have ZERO direction, but I feel like God has really been using this time to poise and prepare me to be ready to make the decisions I need to make when the time comes. He's priming my heart and it's hard and it's painful but it's SO exciting. I cannot wait to see what he has in store... Dear readers, I continue to ask for your prayers in this season. Pray that God will make his will clear and that I will have the bravery and faith to follow his voice. I love you all... thanks for reading this extra long rambling today!

"And trust is that: work. The work of trusting love. Intentional and focused. Sometimes, too often, I don't want to muster the energy. Stress and anxiety seem easier. Easier to let a mind run wild with the worry than to exercise discipline, to reign her in, slip the blinders on and train her to walk steady in certain assurance, not spooked by the specters looming ahead. Are stress and worry evidences of a soul too lazy, too undisciplined, to keep gaze fixed on God? To stay in love? I don't like to ask these questions... But this I must ask and do, out loud: Isn't joy worth the effort of trust?"

- Ann Voskamp

thankful thursdays {25}

discovering purple potatoes (you've gotta try em)

a bit of new found energy
lessons in humility & service

fresh pineapple
sharing life's excitements with friends
and the disappointments too
a new little dance move (right kaitlyn?!)
t-face calling me j-crew
this song, oh and this one too
scoring 100% on my psych nursing test. holla.
a lovely little chat with julie and jace
an error on a student's paper that read "soft more" instead of "sophomore"
helping two hilarious students write a grad speech... oh dear.
a lunch date with my momma
surviving a long string of 12-hour shifts after day light savings

+ check out the countdown on the side bar...
we've passed the big Five-Oh mark, people!

+ Shannon is in town! More to come on this front soon, so stay tuned!


I am so excited for this week's highlight... Blogging world, this is my dear friend,
Jasa

{Jasa and her hubby, Zane}

10 Reasons I am thankful for Jasa:
{1} She is one of the most genuine people I have ever known
{2} She has a heart of gold
{3} She has a super goofy side
{4} Her smile brightens up the room
{5} She always ALWAYS commits to praying for me
{6} She truly cares about people
{7} She is a woman after God's heart
{8} She is a good wife and momma
{9} She has a big sense of adventure
{10} She has wisdom beyond her years (and shares it with me)

Love you, sweet friend!

thankful thursdays {23}

Happy Thursday!
I hope you have had a fabulous week... Hold on, Friday is a-comin' for you!

Here's my list of thankfulness for the week...

Baking scones with Kaitlyn & T-face
Spending a Saturday afternoon reading (just for fun)
Lessons in Biblical financial stewardship
Watching Jake's stellar performance of 'The Bema Seat'
A fabulous Sunday dinner with the fam
Incredibly humbling experiences on BMT
Performing my first Bone Marrow Transplant (oh, wow!)
Girl Scout cookies (sabotaging my healthy diet, but they're so good!)
Discovering Kari Jobe (check out this song)
My car was broken into (again), BUT nothing was stolen!
Unlikely friendships that have richly blessed my life
Doctors that have managed to escape the "god-complex"
Silly voice mails that make me smile
Being mentored by one of the coolest ladies around
peace about the future
&
a God who is so incredibly faithful!

Now for something NEW!


I've been realizing over the past few weeks that I spend more time being thankful for things (like my electric blanket and morning coffee) than for the characters that grace this story of mine. And that's just not okay... so I'm adding a new element to my weekly little project in cultivating thankfulness. Each week I will be highlighting one of these different characters from my life and writing a quick little something about why I am thankful for them. This week's feature: one of my best friends in this whole wide world,
Christina

This chica has been such an incredible blessing in my life. We met when we were 9 years old at Vacation Bible School and grew up going to the same youth group. She was really shy, and so was I. She was into soccer and I was into swimming. We both remember thinking that the other person was real cool, but somehow from 9 to 18 our relationship mainly consisted of a quick, "Hey, how are you?" on Sunday mornings.

We ended up going to the same college and decided to be suite mates our freshman year. We both went into that year pretty broken from brutal high school relationships, but found genuine friendship in one another. Looking back, it is so fun to see how both of us kind of came alive in the strength and love and encouragement that we found in each other. What can I say? I am just SO incredibly blessed by her... From that freshman year until now, we have basically been inseparable. We have been roomies throughout college and have had the privilege of sharing life's joys and pains.

Christina is one of the sweetest people you will ever meet. She has a deep passion for the Lord and is always encouraging me in my faith. Her counsel is wise and she truly does live a life of love... I could go on and on. I am just so humbled and blessed by her presence in my life. God has truly given me a precious gift with our friendship. I'll quit my babbling now and leave you with a little list of things I love about her...

thankful thursdays {21}

{via the notebook doodles}

Sorry about skipping out on my little weekly list of thanks last Thursday. I just plum forgot to do it... Needless to say, it has been a crazy few weeks. But I am back today with an extra thought out list of things that I'm grateful for!

writing letters with recovering drug addicts
a sweet visit from the lil' sis (diet coke in hand)
fage greek yogurt with honey
slap happy moments brought on by sheer exhaustion
the countless people in my life who invest in me
a birthday celebration for my bestie
getting an invite to sigma theta tau
my amazing gym buddy, emily
getting geeked up about the things i'm learning in my seminary class
a professor who (unlike the rest) is not making me jump through hoops this term
and another one who bought me pizza just to be nice
finishing up my psych rotation (holla!)
cinnamon vanilla creme coffee mate
being mentored by one of the coolest ladies around (through a project at my church)
learning a whole lotta stuff about cancer
zumba and kickboxing
blessings from project 119
long chats on the phone with my momma
2 new tires (after having a bad flat)
God's provision
the creativity that comes with being broke
walking through life with the goonies
this song. oh, goodness... give it a listen!
somehow finding time to journal and hit up the gym

and last, but certainly not least...
this precious little bundle


Introducing Isaiah Benjamin!
This sweet little blessing came in to the lives of two dear friends, Zane and Jasa, this past week. We held a shower for them last night and it took a whole 5 minutes for him to steal my heart. You can read their amazing adoption story here! Praising God for this beautiful little life!

Be blessed.

thankful thursdays {17}

I've gone back and forth on whether or not to continue my little project in cultivating thankfulness this semester... I mean, I am sure you all are getting tired of my weekly lists. But by day 3 of my spring semester, I am already seeing that I am going to need to have consistent attitude checks and remind myself of all of the good things in this life. That being said, project: cultivate thankfulness is still open for business here on bright red cords. here's my list for the week...

making it home safely after a great trip down south
deep, honest conversations
feeling refreshed after an amazing winter break
an ordination service for a good friend
news that a friend is adopting a baby in about 4 weeks
unexpected entertainment at the airport
reuniting with the goonies
my last first day of nursing school. ever.
starting my psych nursing course... i just love it
only having 15 credit hours this semester
kickboxing with emily
shopping for school supplies
my dear friend from africa visiting me here in SLC
a fun adventure to Park City
blessings from God's word
yummy thai food

... And I am so incredibly grateful that two years ago today, I boarded a plane for Africa with tear stained eyes and a heart full of expectation. I had no idea then the magnitude that the next 5 months would hold, nor the impact that my experience would have on the rest of the course of my life. So today I am celebrating all God has done, and will continue to do, through the time I spent in Joburg (check out my blogs from that time here).

"... orphans are easier to ignore before you know their names. They are easier to ignore before you see their faces. It is easier to pretend they're not real before you hold them in your arms. But once you do, everything changes" - David Platt

one last toast to 2010

i wrote one of these little toasts last year,
and i'm thinking that 2010 deserves at least a toast or two as well...

{via}

to finishing months of physical therapy
to 2 healthy knees
to prayers for Haiti
to nurse geekiness
to finding a new church to call home
to choosing faith that's based on more than feeling
to finding a healthier balance
to being pushed to live a better story
to embracing a little whimsy
to the closing of a chapter
to little summer blitz trips
to divine plans
to big unknowns
to facing fears
to a slow-paced, Midwestern culture
to family away from home
to heart break over mental illness
to fun adventures in new places
to an amazing preceptor
to new friends
to thunderstorms brewing over dark night skies
to learning to get over myself
to asking hard questions
to lessons in listening
to understanding myself better
to a box of letters
to lessons from mr. lewis
to a greater understanding of God's will
to adventures in public transportation
to struggling through doubt, fear, & discontentment
to gaining victory and freedom
to a shift in heart
to tangible change
to experiencing God's joy
to cultivating thankfulness
to resuscitating the blog
to blessed jobs
to the best study buddy a girl could ask for
to my fabulous cohort
to both the good and bad days in nursing school
to sweet little children struggling with cancer
to surviving my maternity rotation
to confronting materialism
to having the "hardest" semester of nursing school under my belt
to living with a bunch of goonies
to my sweet little bucyeneza irene
to growing pains
to a God who refuses to give up on me
to battling insecurity
to restoration and building back
to african refugees
to my wonderful family
to not making plans

to 2010: what blessed year!
i am truly in awe for the journey this year has been
and i'm looking forward to new adventures in 2011.

Mazel Tov!

what are your 2010 highlights?

thankful thursdays {11}

Happy Thursday!
I know it's kind of the "in" season for being thankful and all...
but, goodness gracious, we certainly do have an abundance of things
to be thankful for... this little project has opened my eyes to that reality.
Praise God for the blessings he pours out on my life every single day!

Here's my list for the week:

singing to stevie wonder in the car with kaitlyn
rain... always love the rain!
catching up with an old friend
registering for my last semester of college... holla!
a fun saturday night in park city
answered prayer
learning to live in joy
yoga with the roomies in the living room
a stellar friends/fam discount at Banana Republic
scarf/pea coat weather
slowly finding victory over a long-time struggle
my green coffee mug
lessons in patience via the exploding plumbing in my house
honeycrisp apples... so SO good.
prying Stranger than Fiction out of my DVD player w/ chop sticks
(hey, it was good for a laugh even though it destroyed the movie)
watching a crazy surgery in the O.R.
hundreds of small hilarious moments at work
yummy pastries with a beloved friend
getting to hold and pray over tiny little babies in the NBICU
a distracted study group (as in, zero studying got done)
the promise of heaven... this is what we get to look forward to

Be blessed, blogging world.

thankful thursdays {7}

hey hey hey!
hope you all are having a happy thursday!
i know it's been a golden one for me...
here's a list of a few things I've been thankful for this week:

a friday night spent with cherished old friends
screaming my little lungs out at Lagoon with 5 of my best buddies
waking up with no voice the next day
turquoise toes
a much-needed baking day & movie night with my momma
lasagna and catch phrase with friends
finally getting a chance to see Invictus
cookies for breakfast
phone dates with friends across the globe
my aunt's speedy recovery after a big health scare
tea season is finally here!
sleepy mornings + silly conversations with the goonies
not getting as much work in over fall break as I'd planned
a fun shopping date with allie
+ the green pea coat I scored
a long lunch date with jasa (one of my dearest heart-friends)
being known for who I really am, and loved just the same
good news from a faraway friend
some alone time... i need it every now & again
dancing in the kitchen to old camp songs with my sissy
a lovely update email from the lovely shannon
just for some space to breathe

"Thou hast given so much to me,

Give one thing more, - a grateful heart;
Not thankful when it pleaseth me,
As if Thy blessings had spare days,
But such a heart whose pulse may be Thy praise."
~George Herbert

feel free to join in with this little experiment in gratitude if you'd like...

Thankful Thursdays {6}

I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought; and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder. ~G.K. Chesterton

first pumpkin spice latte of the season... yum!
surviving a heart-wrenching day in the PICU (definitely not my niche)
holding tiny babies with duck fuzz hair in the NBICU
(so stinkin cute... though, not my niche either)
my hippie little faith family here in salt lake

+ our retreat this weekend
(learning from this guy, singing songs, and enjoying the mountains)
+ a sweet time of worship, singing this song
+ being challenged to be still before God

Celebrating 78 beautiful years of life with my Nana
Psalm 61:2
my job... have I mentioned what a blessing it is?
5 Roses Tea (will forever be my favorite)
laughing harder than i have in a long time... it's good for the soul
an amazing clinical instructor who brought us pizza on tuesday
avoiding homework with tori
(i'm beginging to think that we're bad influences on each other... whatever!)

Hey all, hope you've had a lovely week.
Tomorrow is Friday... you can do it!
Feel free to jump on board with this little experiment in gratitude if you'd like!

thankful thursdays {5}

Oh, what a full week this has been!

{both in busyness and abundance}

It seems like it has been forever since last thursday!
here are my updates for project: cultivate thankfulness this week...

the spatula I find hidden in my mail box every time Steph comes to visit
"I can tell that you like me in your eyes..." - quote from my 5-year old cancer patient
incredibly raw conversations with my small group girls
therapy dogs... pretty sure I get more excited than the kids do
having a crazy flashback to africa after hearing a Lecrae song
i was (only) caught sleep walking twice this week
big life lessons from the book of Revelation
a phone call from my daddy, just to let me know he loves me.
no exams this week (yay!)
my new friend that prays like a beat poet (and he doesn't even realize it)
walking in on the goonies having a miley cyrus roast (while watching this movie)
taking care of some gnarly wounds on the burn unit
incredible neighbors that mow our lawn every week for FREE
watching this amazing goal/getting blasted with confetti at the RSL game
it (still) feels like summer here in good ole utah
a new season of The Office... what would I do without this show?
somehow getting everything done, even when it seems impossible
the truth found in the lyrics of this beautiful song
the shuttle driver who went out of her way to take me right to my car after a 14 hour day at the hospital... my sore feet were so happy!

"We lift up our eyes, lift up our eyes
You’re the Giver of Life..."
{from You Alone Can Rescue, by Matt Redman}

so, so true.
it was just one of those weeks
where I felt like I tasted this God-given life.

red rock country

as promised, here are a few pics
from my weekend in red rock country.
it was such a blast...
wishing i was still there
instead of studying for my peds exam.
anyway, hope you enjoy the beauty of UTAH as much as i do!

my minnesota people

Leaving is always a tough thing.
But it isn’t so much the place that matters - it’s the people.
It’s absolutely the people.

these are my minnesota people.

i've been so blessed to spend the past 10 weeks rooming with these chicas.
i'm really going to miss them.

best preceptor...

ever.

we had our closing banquet tonight for the Summer III program here at Mayo.
it was sad to say goodbye to so many people i've grown to love this summer.
like brooke, my rock star preceptor.
i learned so much from her over the last 10 weeks,
plus she was so much fun to work with!

part of me hates to see this chapter closing...
what a sweet, sweet time it has been though!

{jessica, eden, me, brooke}

{me + best preceptor ever}

{guess who the psych patient is in this photo... oh my!}

Goonies.

The concept of home is a strange thing when you're in college. This little red brick house is the closest to home I've known since I moved out of my parent's when I was 18.

Isn't it a quaint little place? It has been such a blessing to be able to live in this house - it's super close to school, it's in a fun neighborhood,and (best of all) I get to live here with
these goonies...

{Christina}

what I love about her:
her heart of gold.
her ticklishness.
the loud noises that seem to follow her (just a little clumsy).
i can tell her anything. and she gets me.
she shares my love for REI. oh, and bags. (and just about everything else too)
best impersonations. ever.
she's a marathon sleeper (it's a gift).
she's going to make a difference in this world (just watch)

{Michelle}

what i love about her:
her beautiful, poetic soul.
she makes a mean taco pie.
her gangsta dance moves.
she's going to write a rockstar children's book someday.
she's always up for an adventure.
she has an eye for beauty in simple things.
she graciously puts up with my baby jokes.
She dreams, dreams, dreams.


{Tori}

what i love about her:
her passion for... well, life.
how her nose crinkles when she smiles/laughs.
she follows her heart (probably more than anyone i've ever known).
diet coke dates & heart level chats.
she is a total goof (love that sense of humor).
her fun, girly style.
her love for dark chocolate and rearranging furniture.
she has mad film skills (watch out Hollywood).


{Carolyn}

what i love about her:
her laugh and incredible sound effects.
her little dance moves.
her delightful perspectives on life.
she says "holay" after everything.
she's brilliant (but doesn't admit it).
her grocery lists (don't ask).
she loves to "dote." (it's time for a puppy, carolyn)
she watches Enchanted over and over (and over)(and over).


This is my 5th year living with Christina, 4th with Michelle, 3rd with Tori and 1st with Carolyn. I can honestly say that in all this time, there has not been one fight. It's kind of insane how well we get along. It's a little unheard of... and I don't take that blessing lightly. I know this sounds super cheesy, but we love each other like sisters... I've experienced deeper friendship and community with these girls than any I've know in this life. Plus, we have a crazy amount of fun together. Like I said, I count myself as blessed to be able to live life with these amazing chicas. We have another year left together in Salt Lake (which we're calling the encore year... or the victory lap) and I'm determined to make the most of it. I can't even imagine "doing life" without them. It's going to be fun to see where we all land in the next 5 years - I have a feeling that we're going to find ourselves thousands of miles away from each other (which is scary), but right now, were are still here! So I'm squeezing everything I can out of the next year. Here's to a kick-butt victory lap!

Love you girls,
{xo. jarah}

p.s. Missing this roommate today. She had to go off and get married. Wasn't she a gorgeous bride? Love you Rach, things just aren't the same without you...